Auntie Funella (From Jack Russel)

Jack knew that his Auntie Funella was round before he even got through the door after school that day. The tell tale signs were all there, the living room curtains were shut (despite it being the afternoon) and her two dogs were sitting outside the front door.

Jack’s mum had two sisters, Auntie Funella and Aunt Rachel. Funella was the eldest sister and she lived on the other side of the village near to the river. He liked Funella a great deal, and was always happy when she came round, filling the house with laughter, it was good for his mum. Funella had never married or had any children but she had a long term partner called Graham who bred dogs. They didn’t live together, nor would they ever she often told him, but they seemed quite content and would sometimes disappear for a few months at a time on a trip abroad somewhere. Jack liked it when they did this because it meant that he could earn some pocket money looking after Grahams prize bitches.

Funella and his mum were sat on the floor of the living room eating Udon noodles when he got in, and there was a home video playing on the TV. They were giggling, as the screen saw three little girls sat at a table with a massive cake in the middle.
‘Look at Rachel!’ His mum squealed, ‘So well behaved, waiting patiently for her cake.’
‘Here I go!’ Funella laughed as the young version of her reached forward across the table and took a handful of icing off the top of the cake. They exploded in fits of giggles again.

Jack sat down on the arm of the sofa and watched his mum and auntie, there was only two years between them and although Funella’s hair was pretty much grey she looked so much like his mum he sometimes found it a bit un nerving. They wore the same style of clothes and had the same hobbies, in fact it was Funella who had helped his mum erect a shed in the garden, and Funella who had been armed with the sledge hammer when his mum wanted to knock through from the kitchen to the dining room to make one massive space so she could have a felt workshop. He sometimes wondered about Aunt Rachel, who being the youngest sister was nothing like either his mum or Funella and who he hadn’t seen in over two years. She lived in London, worked in finance and had two little girls called Hannah and Sarah. His brother, Sam, said Rachel had escaped but he was inclined to think that she was missing out.


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